Time for yourself

Feed baby. Change nappy. Settle baby for a nap. Tidy up. Go shopping. Prepare meal… As lovely as babies are, life with a little one leaves virtually no time for you. It’s not selfish to crave a little quality time in which to do your own thing and remind you and your partner that you’re still the same people underneath – not just mum and dad.

It’s in your family’s interests for you to be as happy and rested as possible. This will help you cope with the huge emotional and physical changes you’re going through.

“I can recommend kickboxing as a wonderful way to exert some energy and clear the mind. At the end of a long day, my hubby and I don our boxing gloves and get started!” Mums' Choice member Felicity Bertin, mum to Lucas, 1

Get support

Start looking for a babysitter, whether it’s a trusted friend, relative or neighbour. A supportive network is essential for any new mother. Let your partner take some of the pressure, too. The sooner he knows how to care for your baby, the easier it will be for you. This is a joint project, after all!

Ban housework

How you spend your treasured time off is up to you (although housework is banned!). You might have a long lie-in, a haircut, a swim or lunch with a friend.

What other mums say

Jane Brewer, 32, mum to five-month-old Dylan, says: “I suggested to Phil, my husband, that each of us took two hours at the weekend to do exactly what we wanted, while the other looked after Dylan. Phil’s into competitive cycling and often goes out riding with his club. I might read, go shopping or do my nails – things I used to take for granted but which feel blissful now. Those two hours have given Phil a real taste of what it’s like to look after a baby by himself, so he has become more understanding of what my week’s really like.”

It’s also vital to remember that looking after yourself isn’t vanity: pampering can give you a real boost. “I lock myself away in my bathroom,” says Stacey Simpson, “and have a great time exfoliating and de-fuzzing my poor neglected body, and rubbing in all the lotions and potions I never normally get time for, while my partner Chris plays with our baby Chloe. I can’t tell you how much better I feel for it – it’s almost like therapy – and having smooth, shiny limbs afterwards isn’t bad either.”

Rediscover your old self

Try and recapture how you were before you became a busy mum, by putting on your make-up and really dressing up every now and then. It will help lift your spirits, and will remind your partner that you’re still the same gorgeous, sexy woman he was first attracted to.

Being good to yourself needn’t mean spending a fortune either. The simplest treats can be the most uplifting. Reading a magazine in the park, having time to go for a walk or to stroll round the shops can be bliss if you’re used to having a little one in tow all the time.