Tips from a man who's been there...
1) Roll up your sleeves
I attended the conception and birth, decorated the nursery and fitted the car seat. I kind of thought I’d done my bit. Boy, was I in for a surprise. On night one when I was confronted with black, tar-like poo and drenched with baby wee, I started looking around for the hidden cameras. The truth is you need to get stuck in – this isn’t a spectator sport.
2) Spend time with your baby
If, like me, your week is already filled to the brim with work and weekends with Football Focus, something’s gotta give. Once baby Jed was born, I became more familiar with the park than is natural at my age. Work became the place I had naps. Working late was a once-a-month luxury akin to a lie-in, not the irritant it used to be. I’ve become expertly acquainted with the relative merits of various nappy brands. I could hold court over the wonders of Maclaren buggy design. Yes, I have become boring. Being baby-obsessed has definitely got me invited to fewer parties, but I’m also pretty sure it makes me a better dad.
3) Spend time with your partner
In the early days, all we seemed to talk about was our baby. If we weren’t feeding him, we were talking about feeding him. If we weren’t changing his nappy, we were arguing about whose turn it was to change his nappy next. It’s tempting to try and escape to the pub, but if you can resist the temptation you can score yourself some serious Brownie points by getting busy in the kitchen. My wife was too exhausted to make food for herself, so she survived on a diet of toast and biscuits for days on end. You can imagine how grateful she was even for my Ready Steady Cook style of cuisine. Our evening meal was hardly formal wear and candlelight (think more along the lines of a dressing gown and the gentle glow of a baby monitor), but it was about as romantic a night as we got together for a few weeks. Once you’ve survived the first three months, it’s time to get a babysitter and go out – just the two of you. And try to hold a conversation that doesn’t revolve around the baby (bet you can’t!).
4) Have fun
Many dads will tell you about the sleepless nights and the pressure to be the breadwinner. But they rarely tell you how much of a laugh being a dad is. Me, I love it. I’ll never forget my sons’ first smiles, first giggles, their death-defying leaps off beds and sofas. Kids are hilarious and are more fun with each passing day. Sure, the pay’s lousy, but being a dad can be the most rewarding job in the world.
Refreshing to hear from someone who's been there? You can read more diaries by other parents throughout our Pregnancy & birth and Baby and Toddler sections.